Here we are, folks, in the canine utopia of Spencerville, at Siberian Summit to be precise. Our pot-pack of heroes starting with the unmistakable Gabby, a French Bulldog who doesn’t know her own size. Resplendent in her cream-colored garb, Gabby, with her sidekick Izzy and confidante Amy, is shaping a legendary rescue. It’s Robin Hood with fur coats and waggy tails.

Enter stage left: The Doggy Bagel Deli. A savory cathedral known to all free-range, fair-trade, gluten-sort-of-tolerant dogs. Gabby and Izzy are there, standard lunch-hour. Thing is, while snuffling at today’s specials – “Matzo Ball Soup, ruff on the stomach, but noteworthy once it hits the palate!” – the duo uncovers some troubling gossip.

“You remember Charlie, right?” Izzy nudged Gabby, wagging an enthusiastic tail. “The one with the kidney-shaped spots and a weak bladder?”

That certainly rings a bell. Hits Gabby like a 14 oz steak, medium-rare, with a side of golden-brown roast potatoes – the good ones, mind you.

“Charlie’s gone missing, his mom’s a mess, doesn’t help that Mister Whiskers, the damn cat from number nine is enjoying more legroom.”

Now we’ve seen a lot of things in Spencerville, but cats having the upper hand rank top on the unpleasant list. Gabby’s insides twisted uncomfortably, letting loose a low threatening growl. Her usual cheery demeanor blanched into serious resolve. Bath time kind-of-serious. A plan brewed within her, as potent as the heady smell of sausages sizzling.

Fast forward to twilight at Upper Collie Canyon. Gabby, Izzy, Amy, and a handful of other hearty rendezvous at Ruff-n-Ready, chalking out the Mission Impossible layout on the dusty wooden floor. Steak grease marked trails, and pieces of bagels formed topography.

“Our operation,” Gabby commanded, her gruff voice punctuated by the occasional toss of her toy hedgehog (for emphasis, you understand), “is clandestine, covert, and — dare I say it — without cats!” A host of hushed awoos echoed through the meeting. “We’ll infiltrate Charlie’s place, freeze the villainous cat in a curious subplot of catnip, extract Charlie, and evacuate through Retriever River. Make no mistake, it won’t be a walk at the Siberian Summit, and we might even have to contend with those infernal vacuums, but remember, it’s for Charlie!”

A cheer erupted, so mighty it echoed even down to The Snooty Snout Boutique. A rally of multifarious barks filled the air – proof of a punctilious plan, a flawless scheme, and a worthy mission. Charlie, hold on, your fur-mily is on the way! Here’s to the audacity of dogs and the legend of Spencerville!

“Hey Pops, Gabby here! Izzy and I turned detectives today. Upset whiff in town – Charlie, the spotty one with the weak bladder, has vanished! Cat conspiracy suspected. We’re plotting a fur and bones mission to rescue him – a daring blend of ‘Moo-Shoe Pork’ and ‘Escape from Al-CAT-raz’. Expect cheeky ‘tails’ of our caper soon. Gotta run, midnight huddle at Ruff-n-Ready. Keep the kibble warm for us. Woof, your brindle Beast!”

Listen to the story here.