“Hey folks, Mr. Bruce here. Just saved Spencerville from the evil Loud Noise, freed LiL Dot, jumped a moat and won a duel, all before lunch. No biggie for Bruce the Bully. PS: Got a little wet. May need extra treats. Wink, wink!”

Listen to the story here.

Daylight breaks over Spencerville, washing over the grand Chihuahua Castle and through the emerald expanse of Westie Woods. Shops like the bustling Howling Husky Hardware Store and Tail Wagger’s Tailor, a small couture atelier, bustle with early morning activity. As the distinct aroma of grilling patties from Bow Wow Burgers wafts through the air, I, the stemwinder of Spencerville, prepare for another busy day.

Suddenly, a shrill alarm echoes through the town square. Russell, posh in his morning bowtie, barks the cry of distress from Corgi Castle. “Not how I’d planned to start the day,” I mumble. But a hero’s work is never done. I am Mr. Bruce.

Before I set off, I snap up my favourite toy, that vibrant orange grubber ball. My weapon of choice, feared by villains and adored by damsels, it’s been with me through every fight, every victory. I take a moment to refuel; a succulent steak from Chow Hound Café, a swift munch on a piece of Malteser from a hidden stash, and a gulp of courage.

Getting into the thick of it, I’m led by the palpable sense of chaos seeping out of Corgi Castle. My first obstacle, a maze of cardboard boxes. Now, cardboard is my speciality; I’ve spent years perfecting the ability to manoeuvre through it. With agility unexpected from my sturdy physique, I weave effortlessly through the looming maze, rewarded with unconcealed surprise and appreciation from onlookers.

Barely breaking a sweat, I meet my firsthand nemesis – the crimson drawbridge moat. An insurmountable obstacle for any other, but the dread of water is my motivation. Suddenly I hear it, the word that scores my spine, ‘bath’, and in that instance, I know what I have to do.

Fear has no hold over me. I leap, chasing the whispered horror of ‘bath’ across the red water. I touch the other side, drenched but unscathed, greeted by an orchestra of cheers.

At the foot of the castle, there she is, my Lady Fair, LiL Dot, bound by the Shackles of Silence – a villainous contraption capable of muting all sounds, explaining Spencerville’s newfound quietness. My nemesis, the insidious Loud Noise, cackles at my arrival.

A heart-racing duel ensues, my trusty grubber ball against his paralysing sonic scream. We parry, probe, and parry again until the right moment strikes. With a resounding ‘squeak’, I land the final blow – the ball ricochets, striking Loud Noise square in his chest. Falling backwards, he triggers the Shackles’ release.

As the final vestiges of silence lift, jubilant barks and cheers filter through Spencerville. I am Mr. Bruce, the white knight of our lively town, standing tall despite the distinctive 10cm scar on my hip – the mark of a battle-hardened warrior, another testament to my bravery. As the endearing welcome of my friends resonates, interspersed with LiL Dot’s yelps of relief, I take my bow. It’s just another day at Spencerville, my home, my paradise.

The End.