Hey Ma, fought off an alien invasion today in our backyard, no big deal. Used my squeaky piggy as a secret weapon, hit ’em right in the bug-eye. Saved Spencerville, got extra peanut butter at The Doggy Bagel Deli. Still your brave, grumbling guardian of the couch – Thorcito, aka Burrito.

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Well now, who would’ve thought that quiet, unassuming little Spencerville would be ground zero for an alien invasion? It started, as strange things often do, on a day as innocuous as any other.

There we were, the brooding but courageous Thor with his brawny English Bulldog frame and his prismatic pal Gunner, right in the middle of a heated game of tug-of-war at Cream Maltese Meadow. That squeaky piggy of Thor’s, the jewel of his toy collection, was suffering the merry onslaught of our canine competition when the sky darkened.

A ship, hulking and dark, dropped from the cloud cover and hung in the air. Startled furry inhabitants of Spencerville scurried and barked in disarray. But not Thor, not ever.

“Of all the places for ETs to visit,” he grumbled under his robust jowls, his dark rimmed eyes watchful, his disdain for baths momentarily overshadowed, “Why it had to be my backyard?”

Next thing we knew, a bunch of lanky, green things with bug eyes crept out of the spaceship, scattering our furry denizens at Pawsome Pancakes and Doggy Donuts. Well, except for Thor. Brave old bulldog stood his ground, his innocence replaced with a ferocity only a beloved pet could garner in defense of his earthly home.

“If they thought I’d flee tail between my legs, they’ve got another thing coming,” he muttered, inching towards the intruders, his white stripe like a warpaint that would startle even the fiercest of foes.

Thor, flanked by his noble brother Loki, led the charge. Keen intelligence sparkled in their contrasting eyes as they darted towards the invaders. There was a rambunctious war cry (which sounded suspiciously like a grumble at a vacuum), a blinding light and… the squeaky piggy flew.

It hit the tallest of the green beanspluch right in its beady bug-eye. There was a high pitched noise, not unlike the sound of Loki sniffing a broccoli (another alien to him). Next moment, the ship zipped shut and sped away, leaving a surprised but elated Spencerville in its wake.

Later, as we settled in The Doggy Bagel Deli for a victory feast (extra peanut butter for the heroes), Thor wore a smug look. “Nothing like a piggy to the eye to send pests packing,” he chuckled. And thus, dear reader, Thor’s epic tale of defiance and victory over the alien invasion unfolded.

That Spencerville sky has stayed earthy blue ever since, and well, Thor – our brave, grumbling, fearless bulldog, continues to reign on his throne (it’s a comfy spot on the couch), forever ready to protect his snug corner of the world.

The End.

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