Hey mom, unfurled a legend in Pawsburgh today; kinda ruled it 😎. Got the Bone of Scone, outwitted a bandit (adorable accent), and declared a utopia of fetch and treats. All in a day’s work… or rather, play! Snuggles await, and yes, I saved you a slobber-free spot. 🐾
– Adventurer Kai

Listen to the story here

So there I was, strolling down Akita Alley with nothing but the moon dangling like a disco ball in the navy Pawsburgh sky. “Kai,” I whispered to myself, for dramatic effect – because, well, every adventure needs a bit of drama, and who am I not to deliver? – “Today is the day for an epic quest!” Of course, this all took place after my human had kissed me goodbye, bundled up in her big human coat, leaving for one of those ‘work’ things. Like, can you even?

I had overheard the elder Beagles talking about the Bone of Scone, a mystical relic hidden just beyond the reaches of Bloodhound Bluffs. Legend had it that whoever possessed the Bone of Scone could rule Pawsburgh – and let’s face it, who better to reign supreme than yours truly, Kai? And not because I’m power-hungry, oh no, but because let’s face it, I could totally rock a crown.

So, zigzagging my way through Pinscher Plaza, packed with dogs planning their day, my mind was fizzing like Shepherd’s Shawarma after Paw-lickin’ Pancakes. Princess pranced past me, tail high. “Kai, darling,” she purred, literally, purred, because Princess is, well, mistakenly living the dog’s life. “Are you per chance searching for that bone thingy?”

And hey, I’m an open book – with some chapters glued shut – so I didn’t spill the kibbles. “Maybe. Why?” I threw back, all caszh.

“Oh, because it sounds like a ruff journey for just one tiny Yorkie,” she continued, causing my tail to stop. Tiny? Okay, we may need to work on our friendship terms.

Stepping into Fetch! Toys and Treats, a place I normally hit up to snag my trademark squeak ball, today was about top-shelf stuff. “Dan, I need the Adventurer’s Kit,” I barked at the Golden behind the counter who knew his way around a biscuit. He passed me a pouch with all a Yorkie needs for relic-hunting – well, almost all.

I made a pit stop at The Tail Wagger’s Tailor and suited up in an explorer’s vest (pockets! So many pockets!). Finally, with enough swagger to shame a Shih Tzu, I ventured to Happy Hounds Dog Walking, hiring the fastest paws I know. Because, hey, who wants to travel solo? Not this canine.

Into Bloodhound Bluffs we charged, me leading the pack, because have you ever tried following a Great Dane? They block the view! We ventured deep, where the trees whispered secrets and shadows danced like they’d heard the best joke.

As the trail wound up, the mist cleared, and there, in a beam of moonlight stood a stone pedestal, and atop it, the Bone of Scone. It looked… a bit like a regular bone, but with way more gravitas.

But wait, plot twist! A Frenchie bandit leaped from the bushes, brandishing a chewed-up stick sword. “Hand over your valuables!” he demanded… or maybe asked nicely? You really can’t tell with their accent.

But remember that stubborn streak? Well, it charged to the front line. I was all, “Um, I think not, Monsieur Bandit,” all sassy, but with the whole ‘I’ve got secret ninja moves’ vibe.

The stand-off was short-lived, though, because what’s an adventure without a sprinkling of magic? The Bone of Scone shimmered, and boom! The Frenchie’s stick turned to rubber, bouncing him away like a bad check.

Crown neatly on my head – metaphorically, I mean, crown crowns are super impractical – I declared, “Pawsburgh shall be a land of endless play and treats for all!” which, admittedly, wasn’t too different from before but with more organized fetch leagues.

And so, in classic Kai style, I ventured home with heroic tales and just a tiny bit of slobber on the Bone of Scone. Ready to snuggle up to dreams of tomorrow’s escapades. Because even a semi-royal Yorkie needs his beauty sleep.

The End.