- Dog Tales
- November 24, 2023
The Legend of Peanut Butter: A Corgi’s Tale of Mischief and Mayhem: A Peanut Butter PawWord Story
Hey there! 🐾 PB here! Just wanted to give you a tail-wagging update. Totally aced the great shelter breakout with my furry accomplices! If you hear the legend of a corgi turning Pawsburgh upside down – yep, that’s me! 🐶 Jailbreaks are my new jam (minus the lemons!). Stay pawesome!
– Peanut Butter 🥜🧈🐕
Well, as you might already know, I’m Peanut Butter, the tri-color Pembroke Welsh Corgi with a penchant for escape artistry and mischief. The birds usually sing about my escapades back on Maple Lane, but here in Pawsburgh, my tale of the great shelter breakout has become something of an urban legend, flavored with a dollop of dramatic flair.
It all started on a typical day under the fluffy white clouds billowing above Doberman Dunes. I was busy traipsing through the sands, my ears flopping to the rhythm of my own happy trot. But the adventure was cut short when I came across a lemonade stand—run by cats! The audacity! A sniff was all it took to drive me away, my distaste for citrus stronger than my thirst.
As I made a less than graceful retreat, I collided with a statue of the famed Mayor Mutt. The lemonade stand scattered into chaos, and a cascade of lemons went rolling in every direction—straight into the unwitting paws of the Pawsburgh police patrol.
Before I could so much as whimper an alibi, there I was, framed for a debacle I had only tangentially set into motion. A flashy line-up and a mistaken witness later, I found myself in the least appealing part of Pawsburgh – behind the bars of the local animal shelter. The odds weren’t looking too good for this furry inmate.
“Now, listen here,” Booker, the wise old Beagle, said through the bars, his droopy eyes reflecting his concern, “we’ve got ourselves a regular dog’s dinner of a situation, but we’re going to get you out, Peanut Butter. Even if it means going through a heap of kibble and bureaucracy.”
Foxtrot, all poof and paws, chipped in, “I’ll dig the escape tunnel. I’ve been secretly practicing on Booker’s garden, though he never noticed because, well, let’s face it, his eyesight is as good as a cat’s code of ethics.”
Our plan was sheer lunacy—a Mel Brooks movie in the making—complete with slapstick charm and an improbable runway under the fence, courtesy of Foxtrot’s digging prowess. By the light of the moon, I was to sneak out, shrink beneath Briard Bridge, and hop on a boat at Blue Basenji Bay where Booker would distract the guards by reciting his famous “Tale of the Tailless Troubadour.”
The night of the breakout was chaos bottled and served neat. Foxtrot’s dig came up exactly one inch too short, thanks to his fluffy distraction of a frame. Potion proportions flubbed, so Booker ended up singing in a voice so high-pitched that every dog in Pawsburgh covered their ears.
But as they say in showbiz—no pawlan, no gain!
Miraculously, between Booker’s unforeseen soprano solo and Foxtrot’s fluff acting as a snug fit, my escape blossomed into reality. The break for freedom tasted even sweeter than roast turkey on a Sunday.
Soon thereafter, Canine’s Cuisine whipped up a dish in my honor—The Peanut Butter Special: a no-lemon-allowed turkey and peanut butter delight. Foxtrot modeled for The Furry Friends Art Gallery (honestly, I think they just wanted a good laugh), and Booker, oh he still spins that yarn every chance he gets, trumpeting the tale of our daring escapade.
And so, Dear Reader, remember—next time you see a Corgi with white socks and a twinkle in her eye, you might just be looking at a legend. A roguish hero from a tale bigger than the truth, with more escapes than Houdini, and more heart than… well, you know… a Corgi named Peanut Butter.
The End.
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