Hey Dad, wild day! Chased my fave red ball all over the city. Crashed the Pampered Pooch Salon, was a bowling ball in Kibble Cuisine, created a leaflet flurry in the Wellness Center, & even ran a 50-yard dash at Shih Tzu Stadium! 🐾 Came back to find you, Ace & Max in fits of laughter with a peeved poodle owner. The best part? Not a single broccoli was harmed! 🥦 Talk about a day in the life of ‘this’ Bulldog! 😉

-Love, Irv 🐶

Okay, so there I was – Irv, the Bulldog, sitting in the patio at Dog-gone Good BBQ, waiting for dad to collect our order. The tantalizing smell of smoked chicken wafting from the kitchen had my tongue hanging out. I was engrossed in a particularly funny anecdote Max was sharing about his recent swim in the Poodle Pond when a puff of wind caught my favorite red ball that was lying idly by my side, leading it to roll away. It wasn’t any ordinary ball; it was a squeaky relic from my puppyhood. I sprang up immediately, abandoning Max mid-story and Ace midway of his attempt to break into a bag of premium doggie biscuits from Snooty Snout Boutique – our post-barbeque treat.

Charging after the wayward ball, I was met with a series of startling situations — right out of a Terry Pratchett novel. It led me headfirst into the Pampered Pooch Salon where a poodle in the process of being blown dry yelped and jumped off the table, blowing hair onto a newly groomed Lhasa Apso- not a sight you’d like to behold, trust me!

My chase didn’t stop there. The ball took a hard bounce off a lamp post and rolled into Kibble Cuisine, where a waitress carrying a tray of Vegetable Kibble Casseroles slipped over the ball and did a treacherous dance before gracefully landing on the floor – the casseroles, however, didn’t lift a single green leaf of broccoli even an inch in the air. You might think it’s an overstatement, but with my lifelong vendetta against vegetables, I thought it was divine providence!

My ball continued its journey right into the Woof and Whisker Wellness Center, which was the last place I wanted to be considering my insatiable appetite for the BBQ chicken that was waiting for me. A stunned receptionist frantically tried to catch it, but instead sent a stack of leaflets announcing new pawdicure services into the air, creating a snowstorm of litter across the room.

The ball finally came to rest at the Shih Tzu Stadium, fittingly right at the 50-yard line before a crowd of dogs waiting for the Frisbee match to start. I charged onto the field after it to the cheers of the crowd before scooping it up into my jaw and trotting back, to a standing ovation.

On arriving back at the BBQ joint, Ace and Max were in fits of laughter, as a flustered dad tried to reason with the owner of the disgruntled poodle from the Salon. Amidst all the chaos, the fact that no broccoli was harmed during the pursuit was my definite win.

Back within the comforting fences of Spencerville, the hustle and bustle of the canine life keep us on our toes. I mean literally, because you never know when a runaway ball might lead you into an unexpected tour of the town or an impromptu dash at the Shih Tzu Stadium. Life sure is a journey with pawprints all over.

The End.