- Dog Tales
- July 27, 2023
Irv PawWord Story
“Had an eventful day at Irv’s – you know, ‘The Bulldog’s Lair’. We both discussed a serious apple problem, shared a drink, squeaky chicken toys created a cacophony, and fireworks sent old Irv heading for the hills. At the end of the day, we pets aren’t that different from you humans. We battle our own eggshells and friendships daily. Thoughtful tails wags, Fido.”
Sweating bullets in the high noon sun, I approached Irv’s joint, ‘The Bulldog’s Lair’. As bustling as Spencerville’s joints get, but Irv’s place was always hopping. Chickens squeaking, the smell of scrambled eggs wafting around, a hubbub that could engage your senses even before it hits your sight.
“Hey, Irv,” I greeted as casually as I could. The English Bulldog, lounging under the shade of “his” old oak tree, eyed me with what could only be described as an imperial gaze. Behind that fawn facade, I could imagine the curtains of important canine meetings and rendezvous, held under the safety of this mighty oak. The unusual company he maintained, of squirrels and cats was ominous enough, a staple in this clandestine underworld.
“I heard about the issues with the apples,” I began, my voice a gentle prod. Irv’s distaste for the fruit equivalent of rat poison was legendary. “You need me to ‘dispose’ of them?” I suggested, in all seriousness. You don’t take chances in this business.
“Ruff,” Irv growled, flicking his tail in a nonchalant manner. ‘Yes,’ his grunt provided a subtle confirmation to my proposal. Canine cryptographs, you get a load of it if you hang around long enough.
Regardless of Irv’s intimidating demeanor, he was still my pal. Not just my buddy, he was my pal in a way one can only be in Spencerville, where death is treated with as much gravitas as life. A kinship unbounded by time, by passing, by apples. We appreciated our unity here in a place where eternally youthful dogs frolicked under an eternally shining sun, dotted occasionally by frisbees and butterflies.
At times like these though, the overarching calm was perturbed, by an onslaught of bright colors and loud bangs. The yearly fireworks announced their arrival, with Irv scampering for cover. I noticed his sudden departure, “Poor old big guy can’t stand the noise.” I mumbled to myself, nursing my drink at ‘Pupperoni Pizza’. It was intriguing to see the underbelly of Spencerville, the tough guy with the squeaky chicken toy scurrying away from a few bright lights.
Irv, or ‘The Bulldog’ as we liked to call him at the mob meetups, had seen it all. Dude would witness a lawn full of squirrels, and would not bat an eye. Stick him in the annual ‘Tail Wagging Tournaments’; he’d dance like a pup. Subject him to fireworks; and well, turns out all of us have our kryptonites. Mine apart being a weird trust in birds.
After all, Spencerville was a sprawling tapestry of interwoven lives, a place to revisit beloved chew toys, and to face old phobias. Pets wouldn’t be pets without their quirks, would they? Now, that’s a thought to ponder.
As the day drew to a close, I wended my way home, toasted and tender. I had done my part for the day. Provided comfort to a scared friend, and killed a few apples. You get your days in paradise. Until tomorrow’s scramble, as we called it here in Spencerville, battling eggshells and friendships, one day at a time.
The End.
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