- Dog Tales
- September 22, 2023
Albert PawWord Story
“Dad, Pawsburgh’s in turmoil. The dogs are acting like they’ve been on an extra-strong Paws-a-Latte espresso shot – it’s a real meaty mess. Snooty Snout and Pawfect Training are all ears about a barkin’ coup. Even I, with my renowned love for corned beef and disdain for shrimp, can smell the change. Hold onto your leash, we’re heading into a dog-eats-dog world. -Growlbert”
“It was a wild, dingo night in Pawsburgh. The dogs had broken their chains, and none of us knew where the town line began and where it ended. Everything was alive with voices, fur, paw prints, and the air was thick with the scent of adventure. It was time for another of Paws-a-Latte’s infamous double espresso shots with a hint of beef broth, a peculiar blend rigged to deal with the gnashing political undergrowths of this town.
I scanned the crowded joint, my eyes zeroing in on a wrinkly, robust form, unmistakably Albert’s, an English bulldog known to friends, family and different species, as the loving and temperamental politician. He approached his meals as he approached city legislation- playfully and passionately. His affinity for corned beef was a Pawsburgh legend, along with his sweet tooth indulgence for Lemonheads. There he sat, hunkered over an overflowing Doggy Bagel Deli sandwich, chomping away as if it was his last meal.
Despite appearances, tensions had been brewing, the town was no longer a mere playground for four-legged outcasts. It wasn’t the Fawn Pug Palace or the Silver Siberian Summit, hell, not even Southern Golden Retriever River. No, it was something deeper. Deeper than the grooves on Albert’s favorite chew toy, Grogu, or the golden banter he shared with Baker, Lilly, and Lil Rosie.
“Albert,” I barked, sliding into his booth and brushing off some crumbs from the rich mahogany table top, pausing as I remembered our shared disdain for that dreaded vacuum. “There’s been chatter. Murmurs of a doggone coup in the Tail Waggers Tailor.”
Albert raised his ears. Despite his distaste for politics, or the ear cleaning sessions it seemed reminiscent of, he always paid attention when it mattered. And this, was no ordinary day in doggie paradise.
Snooty Snout Boutique’s gotten wind of it, Albert,” I continued, my tail betraying my nerves as it wagged uncontrollably under the table. “And the Pawfect Training Center, they-”
“I don’t like it,” Albert growled, interrupting me. “I can smell change, like fresh shrimp.”
I had to repress my shudder at the image, knowing all too well of Albert’s aversion to shrimp but the gravity of the situation dawned upon me like an unsuspecting visit to the vet. His response was uncharacteristically quiet, carrying a low whining undertone of uncertainty. An uncertainty that reign amongst us all.
“They’re afraid of the new world order,” Albert declared, casting a last glance at his sandwich as the robust aroma of corn beef wafted over to us. “And they’re causing chaos in the process.”
He was right. And so, we found ourselves on the brink of a power struggle, where the very heart of Pawsburgh throbbed, our friendships, alliances, and affinities would be tested. No vacuum cleaners, no ear cleanings. Just dogs understanding each other in the bleak, dog-eats-dog world.
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