Hey fam, Duke here! Rather dashing series of events recently – snuck out, joined a dog island competition, survived survival trials (including cursed cucumbers), all to get my paws on a lifetime of sirloin steak… and I won! Steak for life now, unless it’s eaten by morning. 😉 Oh, the joys of a dog’s life! – Duke the Steak King.

Listen to the story here

I remember it as if it were yesterday, that fateful evening when I, Duke, the envy of every Anotonalin Shepard in Pawsburg, unleashed my untamed curiosity and ventured off to the famed East Pug Palace. Having slipped away from my blissfully unaware owner slipping into dreams, the nocturnal Pawsburg rose in all its childlike splendour.

‘Unfinished business’ was what I heard Jingle’s big brown eyes say as he came bounding towards me as swift as a bullet. There was a competition, he said, a ‘Survivor’ style challenge on a deserted island. A chance for all of us dogs to show off our canine skills and see who was top dog. And the prize? A lifetime supply of juicy sirloin steak. Yeah, you heard that right, sirloin steak. Now you knew, a dog couldn’t pass an offer like that.”For the steak!” I howled under the twinkling starlight, watched over by the East Pug Palace.

We all met at the Spotted Red Beagle Beach the next day, Aurora in the lead with whiffs of her last meal from Doggy Delight trailing behind her. She looked like she had eaten a fur taco or two herself. Next to join us was Rusty, limping along with a dog-eared copy of ‘Dog Man’ snagged from the Wagging Tail Bookstore. No time to share gossips from Happy Hounds Dog Walking; survival was at stake here.

The challenge started with brisk wits and playfulness outshining strength at the beginning. Crackling wits and twisted tales followed, the prose and dialogue loosely inspired by Terry Pratchett’s dialogue, with dashes of dog puns and paw-ful rhymes. Oh, we were a riot!

I was always swift, agile, and charming. The game seemed to be shaping in my favour but then they tossed a curveball. Hiding a key for the final quest inside marinated cucumbers. The gasps and low growls vibrated through our group. I gave a shudder, feeling the familiar chill creeping up my spine. I eyed the green gherkins, a real pickle I got myself into.

Oh, how my brain shuddered at the sight of those pickled nightmares. Then I remembered the waterfall’s cool mist, the scent of the aloes, and I grew calm. Childhood memories often lend unseen strength, don’t they? I took a deep breath, glanced at Rusty, Aurora, and Jingle, nodding at them with a stubborn sterling determination filling my heart. This was my fight. I had to fight it alone. And for once, the love of sirloin trounced the cucumbers.

Needless to say, I won, and every time I go sneak out to Pawsburg with the others, returning home before the sun rises and my owner wakes, I always have a taste of juicy sirloin steak in my mouth. How I wish I could explain the sweet taste of victory to him! Ah well, a dog’s life, eh? You win some (a lot of juicy steaks), and you lose some (the cucumber episode). And that’s the story of that grand adventure in Pawsburg.

The End.

Share This Story: